Tag Archives: advice

3 Tips for Brides-To-Be

3 tips for brides to-be

Planning a wedding can be incredibly overwhelming. For one thing, there’s a TON of wedding advice online detailing all the things a bride “must” do. And then there’s a whole host of other folks IRL who will happily weigh in with their opinions.

How many traditions can there be for ONE day? Do we have to complete every DIY from that “Happily ever after…” Pinterest board? Why does everyone want to make this about THEM!? AAAAH!

It’s enough to make a gal wanna call the whole thing off and head for the courthouse! But I believe everyone can plan the wedding of their dreams . Sometimes it just takes a little bit of strategizing…

So, for all my brides-to-be out there, here are my 3 favorite tips to help you cut through all the noise: 

  • Use traditions as a gentle guide not a do-or-die road map. You can have that walk-down-the-aisle moment of your childhood fantasies without needing to be escorted by a parent. You can cut your cake or not. Your first dance can be in the midst of your ceremony. Talk to your partner about what traditions are important to you, which you’d rather skip, and if there’s room for adaptation. You get to create your own version of the day. 
  • Choose three financial priorities. If you’re planning a wedding on a budget, figure out your priorities before diving in with checkbook in tow. Once you’ve picked your big three, you’ll have a clearer picture of what elements you feel ok splurging on and which you can DIY. For example, music didn’t rank in our top three priorities so we went for an mp3 player plugged into a rented speaker to jam our reception playlist. However, if it ranks in yours, you may want to hire a professional DJ or a local string quartet. I wanted a bouquet made by a local florist but if this detail is something you’d rather save on then, by all means, hit up that Pinterest board girlfriend. 
  • Find ways to involve family and friends that go beyond a wedding party. Sure you may want to have your nearest and dearest standing beside you as you proclaim your love, but I’m guessing these folks have a fair few talents besides looking pretty in pictures. The pieces of your big day will hold so much more sentimentality if they were constructed by the people who love you.  Ask them to do a reading or MC or braid your hair or help you pick out table runners. If folks in your life are chiming in with a whole bunch of opinions, they’re likely coming from a good place–they might just be unsure of how to help. Give them a role to fill!

At the end of the day, wedding’s will never go completely as planned. There will be some detail that completely slips your mind…a last minute change or addition you didn’t plan for. But by choosing meaningful traditions, spending on the details most important to you (and saving on all the rest), and getting your nearest and dearest involved–your big day is sure to be a beautiful success!

(Photo above: Sur La Lune Photography)

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Dear Me: 4 Bloggers Share Letters to Their Younger Selves

Do you ever think about the advice you would give your younger self if given the chance? What words of encouragement you would offer? Warnings you might express?

I once heard that your most inner voice is a version of yourself that exists ten years in the future. Isn’t that a lovely sentiment? Like reaching back in time to offer yourself the most gentle guidance!

With that idea in mind, I asked a few of my favorite bloggin’-ladies to share what advice they would give their younger selves. I wanted to know, if you could go back in time and deliver a letter, what wisdom would you share with yourself?

I believe the resulting letters are not only inspiring…but EMPOWERING! Take it away ladies…

Whitney from Hello Whitney

Dear Whitney,

You are EXACTLY who and where you’re supposed to be right now. God created your generous heart, tenacious mind, and unbreakable will. I know you tend to stress about things, but “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all ways submit to him and he will make your paths straight.” No matter what anyone says, you’re a child of God and perfect the way you are.
(Proverbs 3:5-6)
Whitney

***

Kanishka from A Silent Observer

Dear Kanishka,
Life is throwing random events at you. In all the chaos I still think you are making the right decisions. Yet you haven’t met you. Find yourself.

Don’t focus on the idea of a ‘career’ or ‘building a career’ just yet. Focus on your interests, talents and ultimate dream. You can write, visualize, create and inspire. Make that your life…

You are easily intimidated by people. Never confident. And trust only the things you already know. But maybe you should explore more. Don’t hide away; bring yourself out. It is okay to be honest, yet assertive. You don’t have to be straight out bold, but at least be a little courageous.

Apart from everything else and trying to find love, first learn to love yourself! You are most important to you and that’s all that matters.

With all my love,

Your future self

***

Helene from Beautiful Is My Attire

Dear Helene,

Time will fly and you will not understand how! You only have one life and you have to live it as best you can. You have to love each moment and whatever it brings to you; good or bad, joys or sorrows, failures and successes, it’s all for you. Don’t struggle to understand yourself and find your way instantly. You may never be able to do it, or maybe everything goes as you plan. Just make sure you enjoy the journey and live with the momentum and energy that youth gives you. You will never again be 20, 25 or 28.

Don’t forget something else very important: you are unique, there is no one else on the whole earth like you and that is your strength. Don’t care if others do not agree with what you are doing, what you think or what you say. As long as you do what you really want and love, as long as you mean everything you say and believe it and as long as you are true to yourself.

And as for the mistakes you make, these will become your lessons. For the mistakes of others the recipe is simple: don’t forget to forgive. The same applies to love. Love powerfully, embrace your feelings and your emotions! You may hurt and surely you will be hurt, but everything will pass, everything will be forgotten, new loves will come again and maybe they will last forever this time.

So, live your life to the maximum, live powerfully and with prudence, without any fear of tomorrow, and always follow your heart and intuition. 

Yours truly,
Helene

***

Kari from Life Kari Style

Dear Younger Kari,

I wanted to take a moment and let you in on a little secret. You marry a wonderful man. You’ll have your struggles here and there (everyone does), but you will be happy. Knowing that, don’t squander your young, single years worrying about finding him. In fact, you likely already have by this point. Enjoy living for yourself without having to make any compromises. Travel often. Invest in your friendships. Get a grasp on a healthy lifestyle now (you won’t struggle as much later). Cut back on the sugar. Do yoga (you’ll like it). Spend time with family. Save some of the money you’re making for some more great adventures later on. You are predisposed to working hard. Keep doing that. The experience you gain will be your bread and butter later. You’ve got this. I believe in you!

Your Truest Self,
Kari Chairez

What about you, dear readers? What would you tuck into an envelope to hand off to your younger self? I’d love to know!

Thanks so much to Whitney, Kanishka, Helene, and Kari for sharing their beautiful letters for this post. 🙂 If you haven’t done so already — go check out their blogs! And let them know I sent ya. xoxo 

10 Easy Ways to Personalize Your Wedding

Chet and I got hitched a year and a half ago, and I loved every moment. (You can read all our wedding posts HERE.) It’s a relief when wedding planning is over, but it’s fun to think about what nuggets of knowledge I might pass on to couples in the throes of it. Those Spring and Summer weddings will be here before we know it! I think the thing I loved most about our wedding is how personal it felt. And that’s what I would encourage you to consider if you’re working on yours — find as many ways as you can to infuse the day with what and who you love, your personality, and the way you would truly do things. After all, it’s no one’s day but you and your partner’s! Here are ten easy ways to do so…

Create a wedding website

To curtail the number of questions you’ll no doubt get asked by guests, consider setting up a wedding website. This is the first element, besides your invitations (if you have ’em!), where you can really highlight your personality as a couple. There are tons of platforms that allow you to create a completely free website. Here’s a look at ours.  We included information about our venue, times, and listed a few housing options for the weekend. But we also included some information about ourselves and our relationship. One friend of my family remarked that watching our ceremony felt that much more personal because she had gotten to know Chet and our story a bit better before the big day.

Get creative with ceremony setting

If you’re not married (hee!) to having the ceremony in a religious setting, get creative. Consider lots of options, not just the ones that have hosted weddings on their property before. It never hurts to ask! Consider getting hitched in your backyard, at a museum, a library, or your favorite park where you got engaged. Plenty of spaces hold special meaning besides churches.

Gather your favorite folk

They say you’re the average of the people you spend the most time with and it’s kinda fun to make your guest list a reflection of that. A healthy mix of family, friends, and mentors who have seen you grow up, fall in love, and shape you into the couple standing before them. Sure there are some folks you’ll have to invite but don’t let them overwhelm the list. Gather your favorites as a reflection of YOU.

Make moments to play

I was beyond grateful to have someone in our corner who passed along this nugget of knowledge to us. And doubly grateful that this person was not just a dear friend but also our wedding photographer! She whisked us away for a couples shoot before the ceremony that felt more like an adventure than a check mark on the day’s to-do list.

Buck tradition (if it’s not your thing)

Keep the traditions you like and buck the ones you don’t. Nothing personalizes your wedding like setting your OWN traditions. And hey, they might stick! We totally loved that my brother and sister-in-law walked down the aisle together and decided to do it too.

Have a friend officiate

What could be more special and memorable than having a beloved fried officiate your wedding? Their words will ring so much more true than someone’s you hardly know. And more importantly, they can offer more than stock advice because they’re more familiar with your story and their words can paint a more accurate picture of you to your guests. Just have them hop online and get ordained!

Choose meaningful readings

This was one of my favorite parts of wedding planning but I’ve had friends tell me it was their LEAST! It can be a bit daunting to find the right words…especially written by someone else. Consider a broad scope of favorites (poetry, essays, excerpts from novels, etc.) and then read new material specifically for the occasion. You might find one perfect reading that does the job or you might want to include a bevvy! Then enlist some of those favorite folk to perform with gusto!

Write your own vows

The easiest way to really put your own stamp on your wedding is to write your vows…or even your whole ceremony! Create the structure you want and write it in your own words. If it feels daunting, remember formality doesn’t have to be the name of the game. Your vows can be written in the form of a letter or a simple conversation.

Serve your favorite food

If you’re known for loving a certain kind of food or your partner is famous for always baking certain type of treat, why not include it? I’m a firm believer that food can be an important part of one’s story. And often times the food we actually like is far cheaper than what’s offered on a catering menu. (Says the girl whose husband lovingly made 2 giant pots of gumbo the morning of their wedding while she just worked on getting pretty, haha!) Have a cookout style feast with burgers and hot dogs if that’s your jam. Serve slices of pie instead of cake. Mix up your signature cocktails. You followed your heart, now reward your belly.

Show off your last name

Finally, a super cute idea if you’re stumped for favors is to find a way to show off your new, married last name. We gave out Chet’s family’s signature seasoning – Breaux’s Bayou Shakedown. Google to see if you can find any products that share your last name or get crafty with a DIY or customize some meaningful trinket. Your guests will hold your new name in their heart when they look back at the item (or use it!).

Are you planning a wedding? (Congratulations!) What ways are you planning to personalize the experience? Already married folk – What advice would you give someone just setting off on their wedding planning journey? 

P.S. All photos above were lovingly captured by my wonderful friend and wedding photographer – Carrie Guggenmos of Sur La Lune Photography. She’s the best in the biz!

mid-week round-up

through the trees at sunset

How has your week been faring so far? We’ve been working on getting our Save the Date cards out in the mail and generally enjoying the cooler weather. We took a quick adventure through this Nature Preserve over the weekend and it felt like early fall. A little weird in the midst of February! Florida you’re full of surprises! The other night I watched a screening copy of a documentary about Malala Yousafzai and I’m excited to share my thoughts on it tomorrow. I hope you’ll come back then! May the rest of your week turn out lovely, and here are a few links for your enjoyment…

#IStandWithKesha

Taking a creative approach to educating students in mathematics.

My kind of horoscope.

Human trafficking is all around you.

This book sounds amazing.

19 secrets of IKEA employees.

The mothers of modern gynecology–Anarcha, Betsy, and Lucy.

Hey! VINA is like Tinder for friends.

How to overcome and worry and be a friendlier person.

Children’s inventions come to life. (So cute!)

Adele and Ellen prank Jamba Juice.

Broad City’s jokes reward diehard fans.